I would like to ask what is the best way to help someone. If he tells you, what is his problem, and you listen, and you try to give your opinion and suggest what he should do, and then, things are too complicate, nothing changes. The situation does not change, the people do not change, the life does not change.
On one side, it is hard to see that some mistakes have such a high price for people who probably do not really deserve it. On the other side, you can not really do anything to help but listen. Your suggestions remain unlistened, or uncomplete, or unfulfilled, for tousends different reasons. Mostly, because the person does not want to change or to solve the problem in the way you suggest, but in his own way - which is fine, of course.
But I would like to ask what are you then supposed to do when this person does not find a solution and is unhappy, but can not use the solution you suggest. And this makes you unhappy. Do you have to insist? To force him somehow to react differently than what he would? How can you be sure you are right (with exception of some extreme cases with objectively huge problems)?
I saw once a movie ("Love actually") in which a guy in love with his best friend's wife decided to avoid any contact with her as a kind of "self preservation thing, you know". So, if you can not change the situation, and you have to accept it, but you can't, because it makes you sad... just be there to listen, but be far away to not see it.
Or do you have any other suggestions?
On one side, it is hard to see that some mistakes have such a high price for people who probably do not really deserve it. On the other side, you can not really do anything to help but listen. Your suggestions remain unlistened, or uncomplete, or unfulfilled, for tousends different reasons. Mostly, because the person does not want to change or to solve the problem in the way you suggest, but in his own way - which is fine, of course.
But I would like to ask what are you then supposed to do when this person does not find a solution and is unhappy, but can not use the solution you suggest. And this makes you unhappy. Do you have to insist? To force him somehow to react differently than what he would? How can you be sure you are right (with exception of some extreme cases with objectively huge problems)?
I saw once a movie ("Love actually") in which a guy in love with his best friend's wife decided to avoid any contact with her as a kind of "self preservation thing, you know". So, if you can not change the situation, and you have to accept it, but you can't, because it makes you sad... just be there to listen, but be far away to not see it.
Or do you have any other suggestions?
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